MISSING YOU SHIRAYUKI CHAPTER NINETEEN

Japanese blog 日本ブログ　- Click! 美しい人魚姫

November 17, 2008
LOLOL it's been how many months?! I totally neglected you shirayuki! Things have been pretty hectic recently... I'm finally settled in LA and doode, I totally miss norcal! Socal sucks... I've haven't been sleeping well lately (last night was max 4 hrs) because of stress and some other stuff..? hahaha. Last night was horrible, I climbed into bed around 2:30 and the people upstairs decided to blast their tv until like 4:30 am. SERIOUSLY, do you guys not have class on mondays? Even if you don't, keep it down!!!! Then this morning the people who come to clean our "backyard" came to wash the floor. I don't see ANYTHING that ever needs to be washed back there (it's just cement, we don't have plants or anything)... and they're still watering the freaking floor as I type this! WTh seriously... and I heard the tv from the living room also. Sucks to be a light sleeper. Thanksgiving is coming up and I can't wait to go back! I miss Xiao and Anna so much ahhaha. As for black friday shopping .. I can never wake up early but we'll see this year. I think I'm gonna drag Jonathan to go with me wahahah..it's probably the other way around since he's the one that wakes up hella early and I'm the one that loves to sleep in. I want to be able to sleep well! God, please help me! Not to mention last night I was hungry so I ate bread with laughing cow cheese and then when I tried to sleep my stomach was making weird crazy noises... still is... sigh. Eyes are so heavy. Went to Santa Monica promenade for the first time last weekend! It was fun, now to wait until after finals to go back. But yea, the forever21's down here can't compare to the one's in norcal. The ones in norcal are BIGGER (I guess it's the whole, socal people are skinny mentality thing here) and there's no 10000 rude girls getting in your way o_o .. and they have more small sizes lolol. Ok, I'm gonna get ready for class... and I'm too tired to type anymore. Until next time my lovelies (:

©我真的等了好久

July 4, 2008
Happy Independence Day! It's been a while hasn't it? Anna slept over last night and I didn't sleep until 5 am. Then today we made food as usual and watched 恋空。 I wanted to watch it in Japan but we didn't end up watching it because someone told us they stopped showing it in theatres when that was obviously not true (we found out afterwards). Haha. Anyways, the movie is so good and it makes me feel nostalgic for Japan... The ending was really dumb but it made me cry. I also finished 絶対彼氏 and ugh it made me cry too! Even though I knew the ending... I feel so bad for Soushi =___=. The heroines in movies/dramas/mangas/etc. are so dumb I swear.. always choosing the wrong guys. Summer is here and yet it doesn't feel like summer for me. Orientation is in two weeks. I really don't want to go T_T. I just want to go on vacation seriously.. been so stressed and frustrated lately it's driving me insane.

夏が来たなのにまだ勉強していないね。　今度こそ日本語の能力試験２を取ってやるよ。。。あたしマジで怠け者だから。　
正直、初恋なんて一度もしなかったんだ。　以前の好きな気持ちは全部お熱だった。　今回もただ好きな気持ちだと思う。　恋愛って笑ったり、泣いたり、悩んだり、怒ったりするんだね。　最近、あたしたちがいつもけんかしていて、「もう限界だ」と思っている。　もうすぐ遠く離れて行くんだ。。どうなるのかな。　ドラマや映画を見て、現実はなんでそんな風にじゃないんだろうといつも思っている。　ドラマの中の男の子はすごく優しいすごく羨ましいの。　現実の男はそんなんじゃないよ。　あの人は我侭で頑固で。。あたし大体なんでこの人いるのといつも思っている。　幸せ時間もあったけど最近余り楽しくない。　こんなはずじゃなった。　人生はずるいよね。　But I gota make the best of what life offers me. 幸せは自分で見付けるものだよ。
叶わない夢がいても前に進めばいい。　君さえも真実が見られたらいいのに。　忘れないよ、二人で過ごした時間。　だけど、これが愛じゃない。

©ちゃんと一人で歩いているよ

April 5, 2008
何でだろう。　こんなに信用したのに最後までには失望させたんだ。 "As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let us down, probably will. " Things weren't supposed to turn out this way. You know, I feel betrayed. But the person who let me down hasn't only done it once. This is the second time and what am I supposed to do? Overlook it again and forgive? I'm not the type of person to forgive easily. I don't think our relationship will get any better from now on. I regret the things I did. It's too bad the things turned out the way they did. "You have to take the good with the bad, smile with the sad, love what you got and remember what you had. Always forgive, but never forget, learn from your mistakes but never regret. People change, things go wrong, just remember that life goes on." College changes people and I'm so glad many of my best friends did not change. But I really loathe change. When I noticed that you changed it was a bit sad for me to deal with... It's ironic isn't it, that the people you love and trust the most are able to hurt you so much the pain is unbearable. It's because the love and trust you have for them that makes you so vunerable to getting hurt. This is a weakness that will stay with me forever. I hate good-byes.

©How do expect me to treat you the same

March 2, 2008
幸せなんかない。　いつもけんかするから。　この時期がすごく忙しくて休む時間もないんだ。。まだ好きだけど、いつも繰り返している事が起こってマジでめんどくさい。　眠すぎる。。。これがもしかしてさようならかな。

January 17, 2008
I love WEEEEK, but I think I love With Me more. So here are the beautiful lyrics.

夜を見上げて　まわる星空
君はどこにいるの？
Woo…聞こえないよね　届いているの？
泣いた星に話しかける
Cry with me Smile with me
感じて　ずっと
Pray with me そばにいたいから
心　ひとつに
闇に抱かれて　水面に揺れる
君はなにしてるの？
Woo…まわりの音に　流されてるの？
繋いだ手を離さないで
Stay with me Share with me
信じて　ずっと
Come with me 今は遠くても
未来　ひとつに
この距離がふたりの　想う心を
奪うのは　やめてほしい
君に会えるときも　いつも夢見てるよ

And.. 愛なんて

[手]
どれだけ歩いて　着たんっだろう
振り向いたら　涙のあと
傷つけ　傷つき
たどり着いた場所
今ここに　君がいる

愛なんて　君だけさ
いつでも　求めすぎて
愛なんて　君無しじゃ意味ないよ
生きられない

[西給] 本当に心で　愛せているの
今でも　不安だよ　Yeah～
一人きり　夢の中
たどり着いた場所
震えてる君がいるよ～

[亮]
泣かないで　
離さないよ
全てを　投げ捨てでも
未来なんて　君無しじゃ見えないよ
いらないよ

[手]
朝の日差しに君の寝顔と
照れた笑顔で
うれしくなれるから
そんな君を
感じた愛を　

永遠に

January 15, 2008
Yes. I've been MIA for quite some time now .. but then again this isn't unusual anymore. I am quite stressed actually and I hate having early classes and four consecutive classes monday to thursdays..... yea, school sucks. Must work harder! I really want to watch h&c but it's freaking 1gb on the website and no way am I going to dl a 1 gb episode... I hope veoh has it! Lots of homework and reading to do~ Here is a picture of Mayaka and me! I look DEAD in this picture heehhe.

November 26, 2007
The song I'm currently obssessed with.......(in cantonese btw, it's hella freaking hard to sing in cantonese hahaha).

Boy'Z - 跟踪你

跟踪你第四天来到你天天必经餐店之前
期待你会惯性三点三走过在身边
跟踪你第九天曾共你于CD 铺一起买唱片
暗地戴你戴过试听那耳筒再回味你仍残留那点温暖
望了你很久但我从未开口路上让我在你七尺以外陪你走
走到你街口对着背影挥手并没运气共你拖过手
然而在暗地里跟你游过街也就够
跟踪你十八天遥望你于清早的车厢里安眠
迎面北风呼呼关好窗等你睡好点
跟踪你廿七天陪着你偷偷摸摸一起进戏院
隔着两米与你看好戏上演总算共你曾同时觉得心软
望了你很久但我从未开口路上让我在你七尺以外陪你走
走到你街口对着背影挥手并没运气共你拖过手
然而在暗地里跟你游过街也就够
我爱你有阵时亦不必真正讲出口
望了你很久但我从未开口路上让我在你七尺以外陪你走
走到你街口对着背影挥手并没运气共你拖过手
沿途护送着你在你的背后也就够
我暗里享受那温柔已足够

I love this song! Thanksgiving weekend was hella fun. I love my girls~ except I didn't get to see some of them T^T. Happy birthday Christine! Gota get crackin on school stuff again =_=. More pictures on facebook!

November 19, 2007
What if I said I can't breathe. Just kidding. Finals are coming up.. so many damn things to do! Thanksgiving is this week and I'm so excited to play with my girls before winter break, since I'll be gone most of winter break. Black friday and shopping huh...I seriously miss senior year, when I would randomly go shopping with Anna or hang out with Jennifer and make omuraisu. I really really miss high school. College bites man, hahahaha. I finally get to exhale a bit after this month! Next month is finals but I prefer this month to be done and over with just because..... school is such a pain in the ass. Hm. what am I going to do those three days I requested off from work hahaha. Mayaka leaves on the 16th and most of my friends don't get back until around the 16th too. Then someone probably has to work T___T so what the hell? Oh right, pack! Buy gifts too haha. But 3 days is a lot. I'm writing my philosophy paper right now and I'm slacking off again writing in here. I am such a procrastinator.

HAHA. It's actually November 21 now as I'm writing this.. LOL. The other day I got distracted from a phone call and I finally finished my rough draft paper. Toady was another midterm and I'm supposed to be revising my paper right now but I have to look up where to eat tonight hehehehe. Must concentrate! I want to go shopping and buy lots of stuff this weekend! Black friday~ But ugh I don't want to stand in line at best buy or whatever. Finding parking is going to be a pain in the ass on friday (cuz u know, I don't wake up early and when we get there it's going to be insane). I really need to stop buying clothes and stuff hahaha... must wait until winter break!~ Hm, what do I want to eat tonight. Hannah and Spencer are waiting for me to call them back to tell them since we can't eat hot pot tonight. The dumb two little cousins are over - _ -a. Plans are ruined! Last week we ate all you can eat korean bbq. MAN, I smelled like shit afterwards. It was meat, meat, meat! It wasn't even that good.. the meat was all really sweet and stuff. You don't dip meat in sugar dipshits T^T. I eat out too much!!!!!!!!!! I finally got my beloved Ferrero Rocher yesterday. WAHAHAH, so happy! Ok kiddos, I must go and.. try to work on my paper and look up food because I'm a pig and procrastinator heeh.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY VAN! I LOVE YOU!!!!!

October 23, 2007
I really need to change my layout soon -_____- but I really like this one and I don't have time either. Still have to write personal statement and fill out my application ~.~ I don't think I'm going to do it today again because I'm sick. Damn working next to the entrance on a chilly day and walking around in the cold. I'm supposed to be crackin on my homework and stuff too.. ugh. Anyways, I'm really thankful for all the people around me--my friends and Alan (: you guys make my world shine oh-so-brightly (I know cheesy, but I have to say it!) and can't tell you guys how thankful I am that you're all here for me. It really sucks though that my girls and I are all dispersed all over the place and we can only reunite a few times a year ); but once I transfer down to socal we can see each other more often ^___^V. I know you're all jealous of everything I get to eat (eating out like 6 times a week LOL)! And I do wonder, why I'm not obese since I eat so much O_o.

今なら何度もありがとうの言葉が言える。　今はもう迷っていないから。　あたしはいつも強がるばかりで本当は弱いのよ。　分かんない。　頭が痛いよ。。病気

October 8, 2007
Some people just never change do they. I hate fake people and sad to say but sometimes even the closest people to you are fake. I've forgiven them, apologized to them, done everything to make things go back to normal and yet they still stab me in the back. This is why I love my friends the most. They're always there for you unlike some people. I really hate the people who have done this. Trusted in you guys, believed, whole-heartedly apologized and forgave and yet I get a bunch of shit in return. You mother fucking bitches (excuse the profanity, ze boyfriend is trying to make me stop lol). I won't say I can't believe you guys did this, because knowing you guys, yeah, you're able to do something so horrible. I have enough things to be frustrated about, shit. But whatever, this won't get to me because it's not even relevant anymore. I'll never see you guys in the same light ever again. I won't even ask you to go anywhere, hang out, have dinner, or do anything because you're all obviously selfish bastards. Humans are selfish, true, but I seriously didn't know anyone could be more selfish than this. It's over you hoe bags.

T____T PHILOSOPHY. WHYYYYYYYY, WHY MUST YOU TORTURE ME!!!!!! I'm in the middle of studying for world history actually lol and yay I love world history but ugh gota study for philosophy afterwards. Mommy brought home plums :D yay. Too many things to do this week and I rescheduled with a friend for hanging out cuz I'm booked T_T. Frustrated but things are getting better I guess. Sometimes things aren't really what you expect them to be so eh =__=.

October 4, 2007
Just a few reminders:

. Personal Statement
. Plane ticket
. Scholarships
. INDIAN FOOD .
. Read and study for classes
. Do homework
. Play with Xiao as much as possible cuz I love her to death (:
. Play with Bunny when she gets back as much as possible because I love her to death also. Drag her ass out of her house to play. Forgive her everytime she makes me mad. I love her regardless of how many times and how much she pisses me off. I love you FOREVA baby!!! Molla Molla sarang hae (;
. Stop eating sweets. Because this reminds me of that one halloween when I ate so much halloween candy I got a stomachache...
. Play as hard as I study :D
. Save Save SAVE
. Hang out with Hannah and Spencer as much as possible.

Head hurts.

September 29, 2007
Went out for Hannah's bday today and yesterday! Freaking Spencer didn't call me back until like 4 hours later today - _ - so I was at home doing nothing.. painting my nails and chatting and then he calls me and tells me they're ready! So I have one hand painted and one unpainted and I leave and go to dinner.. then Hannah asks me why I only have one hand painted. Gee, I don't know.. your brother called me in the middle of it! Finger painting INTERRUPTED =____=a Haha reminds me of the Newport Harbor episode name "crush interrupted." I really don't want to go to work tomorrow = _ =, or better, anymore lol. I forgot what I was going to say.. damnit. First week of school has passed already and agh so many damn freshmen. I'm always out of words writing in here.

SO FRUSTRATED! AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *bangs head on wall* Seriously, I'm so sleepy and I have to read like a gazillion pages T^T someone give me coffee hehehe. SO FRUSTRATED!!
「言葉に出来ない、けれど止まらない。　溢れているこの思いが　めぐる思い出を時に閉じ込めて一片の雪に変わる。」　　恋愛はやっぱり楽じゃない。　以前は簡単と思ってたけれど、また辛い気持ちが感じてばかりで。。。いつも悩んでて、迷ってて、考えすぎて。。あたしだけこんなに悩んでいるんでしょう？　その人は今まで何も知らないけど、明日に伝えるときどんな返事が出るだろう。　本当は怖いの。　片思いはいやなの。　もう一度片思いが感じたくないんだよ。　喜歡一個人真的好難。不知道該這麽辦。我想說去口可是我好怕。很想哭。

September 16, 2007
実はね、あたし本当に知らないんだよ。 こういうことは初めてじゃないのに、今までにまだ難しい。　　フリしても心は素直だから逃げられない。　　「約束」って事はあるけどど時々壊してしまうの。　自分の言うことも分からないよ。。。前から考えたわ、この事。　でも考えた後はまあいいやってと思ってた。　　最近はもっともっと考えて、これでいいかなと思ったり、悩んだり。。。そして迷ってしまうの。普通な顔してたらあたしは本当に大丈夫かな？　こういう場合はナに言ったらいいんだろう。　　眠い。
あたしの気持ち

私だけ? こんなに悩むのは
メール来ないと不安だよ
いつでもあなたを感じたい
こうゆう気持ちわかるでしょ?

September 1, 2007
Damnit. I keep eating sweet stuff every single damn day LOL. And it's september already. .. so many things to do this month ~.~ School starts in 23 days *tears* and I finally went swimming today!!! Hung out with Alan on monday, then wednesday was Anna, Jennifer, Katherine, and Van and Ainy! Wednesday was awesomeee and today was chilling with Katherine. We went swimming and hung out in the jacooziiiiiii until dinner and then went to bj's for poozokie and apple pie. OMF . .. I ate ice cream twice today too - _______ -. Must stop!!! Hanging out with Denise tomorrow night :) can't wait to see her! I haven't seen her in months and ah.. eating out again. I've been eating out every day basically . .. damnit. LOVE LOVE LOVE BoA's new single as always and Big Bang's new single!!! I have way too many things going on at once and I just want everything to stop ... but life is like a fat ass merry-go-round .. and there's no stopping it.

BoA's LOVE LETTER

愛し合って伝え合ってもっと傍で感じたいの
LOVE LETTER from my heart
LOVE LETTER for your smile
打ち上げたい　この思いを

誰の所為でもないのにね
いつか怖くなって言いたい気持ち唇でかくれんぼの one sided love

ともり始める町明かり須好きとメールにして
ピカピカの光にのさ君に届きたいのに
愛し合って伝え合ってもっとそばで感じたいの
LOVE LETTER from my heart
LOVE LETTER for your smile
打ち上げたい　この思いを

きっといつでも幸せな
訳なんてないけど
やっぱり大好きな人と幸せになりたいの
隠しなくちゃ踏み出せない
自分がもどかしい
築いたの出会いだけじゃ心しまえない事

誕生日は乾杯して
同じ景色妬き透けたい
愛したなら愛されたい輝く町勇気ください

I LOVE YOU　君に伝えたなら
私きっと変われるはず

愛しあって伝え合ってもっとそばで感じたいの
LOVE LETTER from my heart
LOVE LETTER for your smile
打ち上げたい　この思いを

誕生日は乾杯して
同じ景色妬き透けたい
愛したなら愛されたい輝く町勇気ください

August 23, 2007
Pretty bad mood today! Pissed off because I can't get saturday off and had to take today off instead and today was like a waste of a day. Went to sf with co-workers and didn't buy anything...should have just hung out with Tina and Anna. My birthday passed already~ 19 years old! Saturday was sweet tomatos, nap and hanging out, straits, and golfland! Everyone's busy recently so I'm doing like 6 different birthday celebrations with people. Monday was with some co-workers and at night it was with Katherine, Anna, and Jennifer L. Thanks girls, love you all!!!! I got cake twice in the same day so I'm pretty much sick of sweets for a while. Bunny is coming back on the 9th so we've postponed the other bday bash until the day she gets back so we can do it with all the girls XD. Except Maya will still be in Japan ):. Then I need to celebrate with my aunt and cousin in september! I've been eating way too much recently. NO MORE EATING OUTSIDE! For the next two weeks I will not eat out until the 9th! Saving and not eating out is soooooooo hard to do. I'm going to translate healthy Japanese diet food cooking stuff now so I'll see you later :D~! SOOOOO exhausted.

August 13, 2007
Time sure flies by quickly. It's August already. Finals are finally over so I can work more and play a bit@ But I have to work on school stuff too so this summer sucks like hell. Today after work I met Katherine at DSW and then went to VF for a bit~ ate a bit a pluto's cuz I was starving after work and then met up with Kathy and went to shabuway. Weirdest restaurant ever.. there was so much damn beef!!!!
Must re-dye hair and there are just so many other things I have to do...
My dog just gave birth to a puppy - ________ - again...
I wonder why it isn't that hot right now, it's August! Summer school is finally over and I want to go swimming man!
Everyone went back to HK, Macau, and Japan! Maya chan~ PLEASE BRING ME BACK UCHI XD!. Around 40 days of summer vacation left.. sigh.

Thursday night I slept over at Maya's and we had so much fun with everyone~ we had an okonomiyaki party<3333 It's been years since I've had real okonomiyaki! Hahaha. Then saturday before work I went to hang out with Carl since he was leaving for hk on sat. and went to work. There was a freaking blackout at work and we had to close early (HELL YEAH!) and today after work was the vf thing.
I WANT MY JEANSSSSSSSSSSSSS =.=

Random pictures HAHAHA

July 22, 2007
I wish it was August 9th after my final already! Geez.. my midterm is tomorrow and I know NOTHING -0- but thank goodness it's only MC tomorrow.. the final is the one that's gonna slaughter me. Work has been interesting. Boring as hell sometimes and really fun at other times~ My work money is supposed to be saved but I don't think that's going to happen until 2 paychecks later D:. It's so hard to save!!! *shields eyes* MUST STOP BUYING STUFF =________=; Once August 9th comes.. then aww man freaking Xiao has to go back to ucb. Ewww = ____=. I have so manythings to do after summer school also. This summer is really busy! I have to stop slacking off now and go back to studying.. seriously.. . so sleepy.

Here's a pic of Me&Jennifer at BJ's after work :D and then Spencer making me "hold" the beer cup with Bobby in the background being idiotic as usual.

July 14, 2007
July already! So much has happened. Sooo summer school has started and I don't listen in class so I know like 0 of everything.. must get help. Finally got a job and went out with co-workers after work today. One of them is psycho O_O. But luckily, psycho in a friendly way~ So tired.. my feet hurt so badly. Work too much bahhhh.. must studyyyyyyy

June 20, 2007
MUST CRAM. Not sure if I want to go on saturday anymore because I worry too much about school and my IR grade depends on my studying.. and extra credit is due next monday~ Even though it's finally over, the big weight on my back doesn't seem to have gotten any lighter... why don't I feel relieved? School is so cruel. Must play next friday! Actually, next thursday after my last final WOO HOOO~ so damn sleepy. So many things I want to do in the summer....Alright, time to do more hw and try to study! Gotta cut my hair D:
So after a few years of not being updated with DBSK music, I finally got around to listening to their new single today--lovin' you, but I have to say that the second track in that single sounds so much better than lovin' you. I listen to Kmusic from time to time as usual, but not a whole lot. It's mostly Japanese, then Chinese and Korean music hahaha. DBSK's Japanese isn't that good, but they'll improve since they keep going back and forth from Korea to Japan like BoA.. But seriously, JJ CANNOT pronounce the ZU in TSUZUITEIRU! Sorry, I'm not his fan and Anna would kill me if she saw me bashing him AHAHAH. Must write essay........

June 12, 2007
I'm too lazy to count the days left until I get out and get vacation for 3 days LMAO omf.. school is such a pain in the ass. First of all, I want to say happy belated birthday to my bunny babe! 19!! I get to see you on sunday! FINALLY!!! I haven't seen you in half a year you skank!!! MISS YOU! 兎ちゃん～！！！　会いたいよ！！！！で、「花嫁とパパ」はもうすぐ終わるんだ。。いいドラマだわ。　次のドラマは「花君」にしよう！　けどさ、あの女優が嫌いなんだ。　－。－；　イケメン！！　超羨ましい！　So, I'm going out on sunday after a long time (well since memorial day weekend). I think I've only been out with friends like 4-5 times this quarter. HOW SAD. *shakes fist* Wasn't planning on going out this weekend because I wanted to stay at home like a hermit and do my hw D: but I will bs my presentation on monday.. need to make copies though =_=!

I'm so happy someone besides the people I've intoduced JE to knows my baby uchi! Hehe..I was so suprised when I found out she was also a Uchi fan :D. Actually, it was my friend's friend lol and she asked me how long I'ved like him for.. woman, I'VE LOVED HIM FOR 5 YEARS!! 5 FREAKING YEARS XD!!!!! And she didn't respond to that because oh ho, YOU CAN'T BEAT ME !!! hahahah. Thought I would like to admit, the first JE boy I fell for was Kusano. Okay, ahem, yea Kusano isn't that cute but yeah.. lol he's just SO funny. *remembers the scary house episode* I swear I watched that episode so many times and showed Jennifer.. I love it! When the little girl asked for a cookie and he yelled "NO!" ROFLMAO!!! And then omffff lmaooooooo I love JE so much... Nino got a new hair style! OMF, finally! How many years has is been . .. actually, I think this is his FIRST super dramatic hair style change. Go nino GO!!! Aiba went 金髪 ROFLMAO a few months ago.. yes . .. he looks like such a yankee AHhahahah. So I was watching the latest episode of their tv show and Leader was wearing a "godd is dead" t-shirt.. . *ROARRRRRRRRR* do you even know what it means leader?! Don't wear stuff that'll piss me off!!! I love you but AGH!! I wanted to slap you when I saw you wearing it!! Okay, I have to sleep now..but I just want to say that I LOVE LOVE LOVE 超ラブ KAT-TUN's newest single ^_^! Oh yeah, and Jin all of a sudden just got super hot in my eyes. JIN +0+!!!　　 And Maru is SO cute in the YNU mv XD Bye~!

June 3, 2007
Must diet D:. Yesterday was Grandma's bday so family dinner in SF as usual. That restaurant was hella weird = _ = it was chinese food (as usual) and fancy and expensive but THEIR TABLES ARE TOO SMALL. You'd think rich places would have BIG tables.. but no it was so small = _ = my cousin was like "this place is pissing me off" HAHAHAHA. And then she went on about how fob it was lollll and downstairs they were having a wedding reception ... man I heard chinese songs from WAY back in the day o _ o the memories. I liked Jackie and Leon the best! Haha.
Can't wait until spring quarter is over! Then 3 days of play and back to summer school D: damnit. Remember to buy PARKING PERMIT!!! I forgot until my mom reminded me - ___ -. So uhh, I'm having trouble writing this essay.. how do I throw in cultural criticism in this essay o_O perhaps I need to add another paragraph and relate it to women's rights :o? Confused.
K A T T U NNNNN hahaha.. listening to kat-tun's peaceful days right now and they keep singing K A T T UN~ man I remmeber this song from ザ少年倶楽部... oh memories of high school x_x I miss high school. DAMN I miss watching SC = _______ =.. I watched bambino and ugh I dont know why but I can't stand Jun's acting, only in gokusen. And 嵐の宿題君 is HILARIOUS, omf. Ok I will stop now . ________ . gota do homework! ファイト！！！

My 2nd ice cream creation at sweet tomatoes again. Everyone copied what I did (the cone on top) HEHEHEHE. MAbelism! And a preview of last week's memorial day :D!

May 28, 2007

Hello~ well this weekend-ish has been fun haha. Weekend plans were all screwed up and stuff so I didn't go out friday but saturday and sunday I hung out with my girls ;] and found out some shocking news from Xiao! And I have calculated my spending for the past 3 months which totals up to about almost $500...uh... BAD MABEL !!! Wtf is wrong with me o _ o; Seriously, someone help me hahaha need retail therapy... but no that is not the reason why I am writing here at 12:08 am in the morning. I just found out that H&M is opening at SR in fall of 2007! OH MAN MY FAVORITE STORE NEAR ME!!!!! I CAN'T WAIT O_O!! NO MORE GOING TO SF FOR IT! I HATE DOWNTOWN SF, NEVER AGAIN DO I NEED TO GO BACK DOWN THERE!!! Because honestly, once h&m comes here I'll have everything I need.. macys, dsw, h&m, af, hco, ax, and so on everything at VF or in the vincinity of it HEheHEheehheeheh so excited. Come on fall COME NOW BABY! Went to a buffet today hahahaha so full but I dono after a few hours I was like "I can still eat" and everyone else was like wtf hahaha. Midterms aren't over yet.. I have one thursday and ugh gota cram =_=; got many projects to do also. School, how I hate you. Summer school... I'm so going to fall asleep in my class damnit! Must stop shopping.. we went to vf and mccarthy ranch this weekend lol. I bought two things, had to stop myself from buying more T_________T restrictions are hard. I seriously have to get a job~! Then I'll know how to spend my money more wisely.. and that'll probably make me hella cheap HAHAH like "whaaaaatttttttt? $20 top?! that's like.. 3 hours of work!" Seriously hahaha = ____ =; MUST STOP BUYING!!! I really want to go to the party but WHY MUST I HAVE FINALS THE WEEK AFTER THAT *TEARS*!! CEOS and Office Hoes is the theme of the party too! LMAO all the girls are gonna dress slutty haahha I want to go !! Stupid finals. Finally drank milk tea on saturday after not drinking it for a while. I haven't gone out to eat in a while actually, not since with David and them and then this weekend the girls came back for memorial day weekend so we went out to eat XD recently i've been so busy with no time to go out and hang out with my hk friends =____= and yeah they're busy too T^T so I can't wait till summer starts even though I still have to work my butt off for math .. Ok well I'm super sleepy because Xiao's mom woke us up at 8 in the morning this morning cuz she was MOPING THE FLOOR then Xiao's cousin didn't close the door everytime she entered the room... doode, u'd think someone would learn after the 3rd time of Xiao slamming the door to CLOSE IT AFTER U OPEN, ENTER, GET UR STUFF, AND LEAVE! Sigh, some people are so weird. and UCHI BABY I LOVE YOU FOREVER AND EVER INTO ETERNITY! Uchi baby and Kusano are back XD and doode episode 7 of hanayome was a CLIFFHANGER omf... cuz the preview for ep 8 oman O_O 「別れて欲しい」ってマジかよ?! Shocking.. but eh she probably won't end up with him anyways - ___ - it took 7 episodes with Junno, why switch to boss now? But the boss' character is cooler.. than Junno's. Junno is such a cutie :]

May 12, 2007

T________T my tummy hurts cuz I ate too much. DAmnit lol.. Midterms! I've been constantly thinking about them, my brain's frying @_@!!! Soi haven't been able to get a good nights rest cuz ppl keep waking me up damnit!!! DO NOT CALL ME UNTIL AFTER 2. Do you really NOT know that I sleep past 10:30?! *kicks the person who called me* At least xiao doesn't call me at like 6 in the morning like she did before *screams* Hehe I love BigBang :} Anna and Katherine went to hollywood bowl and yea me of course, being bad with long car rides and long .. anything can't stand them so I said no haha even though BIG BANG AND BOA WENT!!! It's okay. I'd rather spend my money on clothes. $175 of that on shopping LOL. They were like "you should totally come next year!" and i'm like uh huh screw that hahaha. Boa and Bigbang won't be there next year! Bah. Nothing else to say but these lovely quotes/lyrics hahahaah. Stomach hurts T__T.

♬ Honestly I tried my best. I wanted to make excuses that this world was bad
I didn’t accept the fact that love couldn’t solve everything. Until today when I say good bye.
Love is something you must let go even though you want to catch it.
Sometimes love lies. Smiling even though tears come out.
For your happiness I step aside even though it pains me, and not holding you back.
I’ll believe that the world which was unfair to you will be alright again when I disappear.
You realize love when it’s time to leave.. Smile even though tears come out.
Please remember this, that love is like a name.. that you think about it and miss it.. ♬

And lastly, lacking pictures for MONTHS I'll up some pics from winter break XD pics that you guys haven't seen

HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAH the picture with David and Santa is HILARIOUS WAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!!

May 6, 2007

I know. I've been neglecting this blog. I blog in my Japanese blog more.. no pictures for a long while now cuz I'm lazy to bring my camrea around everywhere and my phone camrea sucks lol *rip bb* I don't have time to go out anyways, I have midterms next week and had one last week. I'm so screwed - _ - cuz i don't want to study for polisci but AGHHHH mofooooooo so much stuff to do! I cant' stand reading the polisci book.. and I have to catch up on like a gazillion pages for tomorrow's quiz and wed.'s midterm @_@ f0ck that man = ___ = i'm gonna wing it! (sulks in the corner).
I know it's not xmas, but haha like any other kid, I wish it was christmas all yearl ong (yeah, we know the consequences from that.. but still!)

"Where Are You Christmas"

Where are you Christmas
Why can't I find you
Why have you gone away
Where is the laughter
You used to bring me
Why can't I hear music play

My world is changing
I'm rearranging
Does that mean Christmas changes too

Where are you Christmas
Do you remember
The one you used to know
I'm not the same one
See what the time's done
Is that why you have let me go

Christmas is here
Everywhere, oh
Christmas is here
If you care, oh

If there is love in your heart and your mind
You will feel like Christmas all the time

I feel you Christmas
I know I've found you
You never fade away
The joy of Christmas
Stays here inside us
Fills each and every heart with love

Where are you Christmas
Fill your heart with love

Then there's this one old song from Stars called Heart :] I love it! It's so pretty~ Makes me think, this year I'm going to turn 19.. another year older. Most of my friends have turned 19 already and we're so young yet turning so old = ___ =; oh college.

Time can take it's toll on the best of us
Look at you you're growing old so young
Traffic lights blink at you in the evening
Tilt your head and turn it to the sun
Sometimes the T.V. is like a lover
Singing softly as you fall asleep
You wake up in the morning and it's still there
Adding up the things you'll never be

Alright, I can say what you want me to,
Alright, I can do all the things you do,
Alright, I'll make it all up for you,
I'm still in love with you,
I'm still in love with you

Time can take it's toll on the best of us
Look at you you're growing old so young
Traffic lights blink at you in the evening
You tilt your head and turn it to the sun
You disembark the latest flight from paradise
You almost turn your ankle on the snow
You fall back into where you started
Make up words to songs you used to know
So...

Alright, I can say what you want me to,
Alright, I can do all the things you do,
Alright, I'll make it all up for you,
I'm still in love with you,
I'm still in love with you

The hard luck god
You never had a chance you know
Incurable romantics never do
He held the flame I wasn't born to carry
I'll leave the dieing young stuff up to you
You get back on the latest flight to paradise
I found out, from a note taped to the door
I think I saw your airplane in the sky tonight
Through my window, lying on the kitchen floor.

Alright, I can say what you want me to,
(I want more)
Alright, I can do all the things you do,
(Give me more)
Alright, I'll make it all up for you,
I'm still in love with you,
I'm still in love with you,
(I want more)
Alright, I'll say you want me to,
(Give Me More)
Alright, I'll do all the things you do,
(I Want More From You)
Alright, I'll make it all up for you,
I'm still in love with you,
I'm still in love with you

Such a pretty song! Well, lots of things to do!! I miss when I could hang out with my friends whenever = _ =

April 25, 2007

ダークチョコが好きだよ～ Hard to like at first, then you become addicted and can't let go. I shouldn't be writing in here right now, have an assload of homework to do......... all the reading *pulls hair out* so hungry T_____T DAMN ALL THE READING!!!!!!! Midterm next week and week after that . .. woopeeeeeee. School is so exhausting = _ =. 眠いと腹減った。。。。。。。。。。。

April 24, 2007

片思いの女の子へ。。這些是我以前的感覺。我希望不會再一次經驗這些難過的感覺。

哭了好久
在你的後邊看只你
你可能知道，知道
我喜歡你

好喜歡你
可是我好怕告訴你聼
怕你會給我藉口
你一直不喜歡我

我現在先明白
等待的意義
不會再哭了
一定不會再
不喜歡我的人的後邊哭

等待。。。去死。

我一直都在 - 林稷安/程于倫

遥望着你背影　有孤單太蒼白　
我多麼想陪着你　走過人山人海

當天空變灰白　你的憂傷澎湃　
我多麼想走近你　緊鎖的心海

我一直都在　你身後等待　
等你有一天　回過頭看我
我的笑送給你希望你快樂　妳的難過都給我
關於你的一切我都好好收藏着
我一直都在　你身後等待
　等你有一天　能感覺到我
就算我在你世界渺小像一顆塵埃
我也會給你我所有的光和熱

當天空變灰白　你的憂傷澎湃　
我多麼想走近你　緊鎖的心海

我一直都在　你身後等待　
等你有一天　回過頭看我
我的笑送給你希望你快樂　妳的難過都給我
關於你的一切我都好好收藏着
我一直都在　你身後等待
　等你有一天　能感覺到我
就算我在你世界渺小像一顆塵埃
我也會給你我所有的光和熱

我鼓起勇氣吶喊　你要聽的見
我不許你再孤單　要你擁抱我給的溫暖

我一直都在　你身後等待　
等你有一天　回過頭看我
我的笑送給你希望你快樂　妳的難過都給我
關於你的一切我都好好收藏着
我一直都在　你身後等待
　等你有一天　能感覺到我
就算我在你世界渺小像一顆塵埃
我也會給你我所有的光和熱

ねえ、知ってる？　あたし何度も恋のために待っていたわ。　しかし、待っているのは辛いよ。　「こんなに辛くて、苦しくて、悪い思い出をさせてばかりなら愛なんていらない」と思う。　よく理解できるよ、今はただ勉強の方がもっと大事だって事。　だからね、もう一度簡単に恋を落ちないように、心のそこからマジで過去の片思いを全部捨てて、新たの始まりがするんだ。　忘れたいけど、忘れられない思い出はいつもあるからしょうがないでしょう。。。頑張れあたし！

April 18, 2007

HAPPY BRITHDAY TO MY LOVELY DEARS: TINA, AINY, XIAO JING, AND ANNA! LOVE YOU GUYS SO SO MUCH!! Yesterday was Tina's birthday and today is Ainy's. Gosh, we're turning into old hags! 19 is the last year we get to be in the 'teen' years! Then once we turn 20 we're super old T___T but 21 we can drink! (In asia we can already drink though HAHAHA). So when we turn 21 (hell u guys have been drinking since high school so it doesn't really matter lol) BUT! we can drink and celebrate in public without hiding our drinks in water bottles LMAO once we turn 21.. agh 3 more years hahahah. Anyways, I have SOOOOOOOOO much shit to do it's making me cringe with pain = ______= why must life be so cruel!? Just wanted to say that ahah I LOVE IM JU HWAN :D!

omftina he's sooooooooooooooooooooo cuteeeee~! Life is so cruel T___________T

April 14, 2007

Spring sucks BUTT FOREVER. Let me just start out with: This quarter sucks and is going to suck the most!!! I hate spring, oh yes I do, because of the allergies and to make things worse my classes are hella hard and I didn't get a class that I was on the waiting list for because the teacher is an IDIOT. Not to mention BLIND! Exhausted and it's only the first week of school too. My eye is twitching hahahaha. I sleep too late = _ =. Today I went out with Denise :] haven't seen her in a while! Had to wake up early T_T 11:30 T__________T; Tomorrow I have to wake up around the same time cuz I'm going out with friends again. Last week was so hectic, my spring break wasn't really a spring break at all.. I only got to play 1 1/2 days with friends and the rest was other stuff. Thanks Carl and David for helping me! :D!!!! Listening to BigBang right now. Oh man, Seung Ri is so freaking CUTE!!! I feel weird saying this cuz he's 2 years younger than me but he totally doesn't look like he's 16 hahahah, he looks like he's my age! Top is cute too~ I love their voices. G dragon's "This Love" is ... the lyrics are sad lol. So many things to do and so little time. I don't want to read ... damnit.. must read on sunday like nonstop. I'm booked with plans for like the rest of the month~ If I don't write in here after this I just want to say happy birthday to (in order): Ainy, Tina, Xiao Jing, and Anna! Love my girls! I can't wait until ... well I don't know hahahha. I just can't wait until I get to go shopping in SF? I never though I would say this but, I miss you Cody!!!!!!

April 1, 2007

1 month since I haven't written in here. Hehehe... School has been hectic and it's easier to write in my japanese blog (all i have to do is log in and type and add smiley faces, whereas for this blog i have to do a whole mess of other stuff). BoA came out with her 22nd single WOO!~!!!! it's called "Sweet Impact" and she's back again with her boyish look like in make a secret hehe. Loveeee this song~ Love BoA ^0^! SPRING BREAK IS HERE!! HEEHEH. Doing lots of stuff this week =o= gonna be so exhausted. M-FLO has a new album and I'm so addicted to it (heart!). Love me after 12am :) Let's see.. nothing much to write about. Weather is wack as usual. I finally watched The Da Vinci Code yesterday lol. Kind of creepy and makes you think! But yeah like 99.9% of that movie is made up haha. Man, I miss my uchi baby ;___;!!! JOHNNY! GIVE HIM BACK!!!!!!!! I was watching NewS on utaban and it was friggen hilarious! I translated it too lol they kept getting electricuted in the ass hahahahahahah and tesshi got like 3 questions wrong and yamap got hella mad and started yelling lol then koyama was like don't get so mad hahahha. KOYAMAAAAAAAAA is so cute! His annoying voice doesn't annoy me anymore lol. HYD2 finally ended and drool ... 花沢類！！！　理想の男だ！！！！ *sigh* if only there were more guys like him, but guys like him make up 2% of the male population LOL *screams* Can't wait until saturday! Shopping!!! HAha went shopping on friday too but it felt .. incomplete. Got stuff and read manga lol. So kj8 news, honestly I don't even know if they still play honjani/mugendai but I miss them T_T. For arashi, damn i love them! The old arashi tv show was hilarious and now they have G no arashi wahahha. AIBAAAAAAAA and koyama remind me of each other except we all know that aiba chan is more kuu kuu in the head than koyama is. Koyama is more composed and aiba chan is a baby lol. Aiba always sounds like he's losing his voice though =_=^^ baby are you alright. Watched lots of friends and gilmore girls lol. AGHH I WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS IN SEASON 6!! Watching friends right now ahhaha season 9 baby. Hehehe, until next time!

In memory of my missing Uchi baby. This is the first picture (I believe) that I ever saved of him. MY BABBBBBYYYY!!!